Choices

In a very reflective mood today ... attended a viewing/funeral of a friend.
Choices ... is what most impacted me through this situation. The choice to be open to relationships with people and the opportunities that are presented ... or the choice to be closed ... hiding behind our walls of mistrust, judgement or selfishness.

For the record, this man believed in the Lord, accepted Jesus as his Savior and was active in a church. For me, the certainty of his eternal destiny brought peace and acceptance ... and so I've been able to move past being concerned about that ... and on to pondering other things about life.

He loved to sing and had the most amazing voice ... the kind that you can listen to for hours and hours. He was amazingly optimistic ... despite severe health problems and various physical challenges ... this man was upbeat and positive. Comments of encouragement were always ready to come out at any moment. He saw the good in people ... he saw the positive ... and he never failed to point out those things.

I don't remember EVER having one negative conversation with this man at all. He never saw a glass that was half empty ... it wasn't even a possibility.

There was a genuine "love" or acceptance for people ... again, always seeing the good in someone. He liked people ... and enjoyed any time that was given to spend with those privileged enough to know this wonderful and gentle man.

It may sound like I knew him well ... I didn't.

I could count on one hand the opportunities where I made the choice to spend time with this man. On the other hand, I cannot count the opportunities that I made a different choice ... to not spend time with this man. I was busy, I didn't have time, I didn't feel comfortable ... blah, blah, blah ... just lousy excuses for being selfish with my time and my heart.

I learned more about this man at his funeral ... then I did when he was alive.

That makes me sad ... not guilty ... but sad. Sad that I didn't take advantage of the opportunities that were presented before me ... the opportunity to spend time with him and to learn firsthand the things that were said today.

The things I wrote earlier ... most traits or characteristics that I did observe personally. But there was so much more to this man ... the things that he accomplished ... the places that he volunteered ... his incredible passion for knowledge and conversation ... the places he worked ... his views on life and his experiences and knowledge gained during his relationship with the Lord.

So much that I would say to him now ... so many questions that I would ask ... what a privilege it really would be to spend time with him ... to get to know him ... but it's too late. Those opportunities have passed ... and I can't get them back.

While I cannot change the past ... and that is why there is no guilt ... I can make the choice to still learn something from this man.

To look at every encounter with a person as an opportunity ... not an opportunity to witness ... not an opportunity to get them "saved" ... not an opportunity to help them get their life straightened out ...

An opportunity to just spend time with them ... to get to know them ... to get a close up and bird's eye view of God's splendid craftsmanship. Unique in character ... unique in experiences ... unique in how they view life ... unique in how they think ... unlike anyone else in this entire world.

Dan, I didn't spend much time with you ... I didn't accept the opportunities that were provided to me to get to know you better ... but I pray that I will hold on to what I have experienced through your physical death on this earth ... and that I will remember these experiences every time I have an opportunity to spend time with people.