Yesterday morning I woke up ... sat outside and thought about my day. My boss told me last week that she wanted me to work in the office vs. working from home. It was only going to be a 1/2 day because the cable folks were coming to connect internet service and cable.
I reasoned my way through it ... thinking I would be much more productive if I worked from home. I could work longer without the commute ... but the truth is that I just didn't feel like getting dressed and driving for 1.5 hours to get there.
Still, my boss specifically told me to come into the office. (Sigh) It was an authority issue ... something I struggle with. I've only recently become aware that my boss and the authority that she has over me ... is designed and approved by God Himself.
Submitting (doing what they tell me) is just part of God's plan ... and is probably the hardest issue that I've kicked against ... at least recently.
Somewhat of a rebel ... I tend to want to do things my way and not listen to what others tell me to do. Now when God tells me to do something ... I may not always do it ... but I'm a lot more open to it. I mean, it's God, right?
So how does that equate to the rest of the time when God ISN'T specifically telling me what to do?
Authorities....
People placed in my life whose specific priority is to BE an authority in my life ... that could be my boss, that could be the person in charge of a service project ... basically, anyone who has been put in charge over me. For kids ... that would be mom and dad. It can also be a police officer or a judge in court.
Authority comes in many different forms ... but all designed and put into place by God ... for the purpose of teaching, disciplining and lots of other difficult lessons. Read Romans 13 below ... the part that gets me is where it says if you don't do what is right, you should fear the one in authority because they have been given the "sword" for a reason! Ouch!
ROMANS 13: Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and he will commend you. For he is God's servant to do you good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God's servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer.
Surrendering our will ... my desire to do what I want to do ... is an age-old battle. Flesh vs. spirit.
My will versus God's will. Self is strong and kicks hard against dying...but that is the goal. In order to be led by the Spirit ... self has to die.
So why bother, right? If it's that hard, why do it?
I can only answer that based on what I know. When I stop fighting ... when I stop trying to do what I want to do ... then the Spirit (God) can actually do something with me. Led me to help others, led me to pray for people, led me to avoid situations ... you get the picture. By losing my life, I find it. I find a life that I never imagined.
I'm really learning a lot with the kids right now ... a 13 year old and a 17 year old. The difference in "self will" is astounding. Both hate it when we tell them what needs to be done. Both get mad ... and both get that teenage attitude. But after the initial attitude ... the younger tends to surrender more quickly than the older.
Don't know why ... I guess we are all different. Some surrender more easily than others. But the one thing that is true for both of them ... they both come face to face with their own heart ... and they both have the desire to rebel against whatever is being asked. Personally, I want to throttle both of them. (Hmm ... wonder if God thinks that way when I don't want to listen.)
So how did my day turn out?
I went into the office ... and when I stopped for gas in Haymarket ... I ran into someone that played a pivotal part in my life ... someone who was only in my life for less than a year ... someone I hadn't seen for 4 years. Someone who believed me when no one else did. Someone who gave me strength (by believing in me) and encouragement when I left my husband ... left everything ... and made the decision to listen to God. He's not a Christian ... doesn't go to my church and doesn't live anywhere close to me. My point ... our paths would never have crossed again.
I've prayed for this person occasionally ... always hoping that I would have a chance one day to say "thank you."
If I had not gone to work that day ... I would have missed that opportunity.
And never to be one that does anything in a small way ... God showed off again that day. There were two deer that came to visit my office ... in the parking lot behind a bunch of office buildings ... and across from the police training facility ... where gunfire and screeching tires ... helicopters and all kind of noises were present.
Those deer shouldn't have been there ... yet there they were ... munching on grass and content to stay there for as long as I could stay outside to watch them.
You may not think much of these two things ... but it was just a little reminder that God notices when I do the right thing ... and sometimes he tells me that he notices.
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